It’s often said in jest, “You’re fired!” but the reality behind these words can provoke a
deep, introspective journey, especially when it comes to managing our personal life
teams. Mentorship and guidance are disciplines of their own, requiring one to adhere to
the very advice they give. As ironic as it may sound, this is the essence of self-
discipline. The advice I offer, whether through conversation or in my writings, is not
just tough—it reflects the challenges I face daily.
So, let’s talk about the concept of a “life team.” Who’s on yours? These are the
individuals who contribute positively to your life, respecting your boundaries and
remaining present through your highs and lows. They are the ones who genuinely
enrich you. But what happens when someone on your team stops contributing
positively? When they no longer respect those boundaries, or does their presence
become more draining than beneficial?
This is where difficult decisions come into play. They might sound as drastic as
marriage, divorce, or a break-up because, in essence, they are a form of relationship
management. We experience heartbreak in these scenarios not just due to loss but also
due to perceived failure—the failure to maintain a mutually respectful and healthy
connection. Our fears about change and others’ perceptions often keep us tethered to
dysfunctional dynamics longer than necessary.
It’s crucial to evaluate each member of your life team regularly. Who is helping you
grow, and who is causing you to wilt? I’ve recently had to make an evaluation, leading
to a serene yet firm conversation with a team member from whom I needed to reclaim
my energy and emotional stability.
The decision to remove someone from your life team should never be taken lightly, but
it must be done when necessary to protect your peace and mental well-being. It’s a
sobering realization that no one is immune from these tough calls—not even those
closest to us. And yes, even the ones we love can be the ones who need to go if they
continually overstep boundaries and contribute negatively to our lives.
As I navigate these personal decisions, I am reminded that such actions, though
painful, are liberating and necessary for personal growth. As daunting as they may be,
initiating fresh starts brings a refreshing sense of freedom and clarity. We owe it to
ourselves to ensure our life team is composed of members who genuinely deserve to be
there, respect us, and enhance our life’s journey.
In conclusion, evaluate your team diligently. Engage in those tough but respectful
conversations. Decide who stays and who needs to go. This isn’t just about maintaining
harmony; it’s about thriving and ensuring that those in your inner circle are there for
the right reasons. Remember, managing your life team is not just an act of self-
care—it’s an act of self-respect.